Ann Jane Evans Sainsbury Dreams To Help Her Go On

Ann Jane Evans Sainsbury
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Mary Sainsbury Visser
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Steven Mathew Visser
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Me

On December 31, 1926 we were blessed with another lovely son. we named him Charles Bailey after his Grandfather and Grandmother Evans. After Bailey was born we had a lot of sickness in our home. My husband had blood poisoning in his leg and was very sick. I had weeping ulcers in one of my eyes. Mary was in bed with Scarlet Fever. Baily was also very sick. Calvin was the only one that was not sick. There we all were and we couldn't have any help because of being quarantined with Scarlet Fever. My father came down and helped all he could with the outside work.  But having faith in our prayers and having the priesthood in our home and with the help of the Lord, we all came through on top and were all well again. After having so much sickness in our family and the death of my mother and Evah, for some reason or other, I hardly knew why, I guess i just got a little weak and gave up. With not thinking too much of what I was doing, I sure got discouraged and down-hearted and everything got so dark before me. I just thought, "What's the use of going on?" I didn't care whether worked in the Church or not. I didn't do the things for my family like I used to do. Mary would say to me, "Mama, what's the matter? You don't go to Primary anymore or make play dinners for me like you used to when Evah was here." I just couldn't understand why all these bad things had to happen to us and not the rest of the family.
We lived a pretty good life, I thought. We always paid our tithing and all other donations that were required of us by the Church. At this time we were building our new chapel and we made our  payment that was asked of us. My husband spent a lot of time helping with the work on the Church. We always attended our meetings and accepted the different organizers of the Church.
Now the thought came to me. "Was I doing the right thing to feel this way?" and that maybe this was a test the Lord was putting me through to see how strong my faith was. But anyhow, at the time I was feeling this way I had two dreams. The first one I was shown by a person I didn't know, many different kind of homes built. As were going along we came to one house that did not look so good. It was sort of old and shabby. The board walks and the little fence around it was all torn down. Here we stopped and this person spoke and asked me if I knew whose home this was. I said "NO." The person told me whose it was. I told him that, "He had a new home with flowers  all around it before he died." He answered and said, "Well, this is all the treasures he has given to us for a place for himself." We walked a little ways farther and we came to a beautiful home. It was painted white, with nice sidewalks, and a little white fence all around it with beautiful flowers and bushes. I was asked if I knew who this one belonged to. I said that I didn't know. Then he told me that it was my mother's home. I answered him and said,"My mother had a nice home." He said, "This is the kind of place your mother built for herself with the treasures she laid up in Heaven while on earth." That was the end of my first dream. I didn't think much about it, only to wonder what a funny dream to have.
After a while I had another dream. This time I thought I went to the cemetery to put some flowers on Mother's and Evah's graves. I put the flowers on Evah's grave, but I couldn't seem to find Mother's grave. It seemed to me like it was in another place on a hill and to get there I would have to go up some steps. I found the steps but I just could not climb up them. I tried and tried but I kept falling back and could not climber so I started to cry and this woke me up.
I thought about it and why I should dream a dream like that, and what did it really mean. When I thought about these dreams, the more it worried me. I just could not get them off my mind. They were with me all the time.
I just kept on wondering about them and if the really meant anything to me. By this time I knew the only thing for me to do was to pray to my Father in Heaven about them. Having lots of faith in prayers, that's what I did. I knew my Father in Heaven would answer my prayers if it was for me to know because he had done it many times when I have asked for help.
I knelt down on my knees beside my bed and prayed to my Father in Heaven if he would please make it known unto me if these dreams really did mean anything to me. I went about my work as usual and it wasn't very long before I received my answer to my prayers.
One morning, when I was sitting on the foot of my bed, alone, I heard a voice speak to me as plain as it could be and it said, "Go to Brother Hale's vision that you have and read it." I had a copy of the vision that he had while he was sick at one time. I got the paper and sat down in my rocking chair in front of the fireplace and began to read it. When I got to the part that told of him visiting Heaven, my front room was filled with such a beautiful light and I was sitting in the middle of this beautiful light which was all around me. Words cannot express the beauty of it. It was such a heavenly sight to behold, and the paper that I was reading dropped to the floor.
When I looked up, there was my Mother. she was sitting in such a beautiful white chair all trimmed in gold. She was so beautiful and happy all dressed in white and was wearing a gold crown on her head.
Sitting in front of her on small chairs was a group of small children and among them was my little daughter, Evah. She was so beautiful and happy. They looked just like little angels.
I went up as far as the children toward my mother. I came to some steps, and went to go up to them to my mother. But there was a person standing there and wouldn't let me go any farther. This person spoke to me and said, "You cannot go to where your Mother is. If you want to go up there you must go back and finish your work. There is much more for you to do." At that moment the beautiful lights and everything disappeared and there I was sitting in my chair. It seemed to me that I had explain how I felt at this time.
I knew for sure now that this was a test the Lord was putting me through to try me out to see if I would give up and not have the faith to go on and do the work that I should do to gain Eternal life with my Father in Heaven, and be with my loved ones who had gone on before me. I knew by the feeling I had within myself that this was the answer to my prayers.